Friday, February 18, 2005

Deapan Conversations: Stapler Supplement

Yesterday afternoon, in the office. An academic comes in, asking to borrow a stapler

Academic: Nice stapler.
Me: Yes.
A: Where did you get a stapler this nice?
Me: Catalogue.
A: How come I can never get my hands on stationery this nice?
Me: Dunno. It staples up to 60 sheets at once, though.

Want to know the secrets of the Rorshach Blot Test? You know, the one with the ink blots you used to make in nursery school, but you're meant to tell your psychiatrist what you see in it, and they sit there and nod and make notes in their pad? Click here to find out. It will allow you to give all the results if you want to avoid the chair for your crimes.

On the other hand, you can look at my answers:

1. Fox.

2. Decomposing Fox.

3. Hips (of a skellington).

4. I did see a giant looming above me, but I didn't notice the giant penis until later. Please don't lock me up!

5. Ladies' bits. I mean, butterfly! Butterfly!

6. Mexican on a bicycle.

7. False beard?

8. Haunted monkey skull.

9. Cuddly-wuddly koala.

10. Crabs having an orgy.

I've not read the results too much, so feel free to practice amateur psychiatry on me. It's like being Cracker, without being morbidly obese and annoying!


  1. oooo dear. Its not good Jim. I'm afraid I'm going to have to give you the diagnosis of being excessivly sane.

    That's right, you're too sane and its not healthy. I suggest you try and lose a few brain cells. Some possible ways of doing this are to talk on your mobile all day and soak up that radiation, or head bang.