Explanation Required

OK, this really needs a photo, which I'll add later, but I'm so perplexed that I need explanations immediately.

I went out and got drunk on tuesday evening. Not in itself a noteworthy act, but patience, reader, patience. Having worn smart shoes yesterday (Note: this is relevant, and not merely extraneous detail), I didn't notice until this morning that my shoes were covered in purpley blue paint. Now, I admit that I was drunk, but I made my way back safely enough, and don't recall any puddles of paint, paint cans, weirdly painted areas of paving, encountering Jackson Pollock imitators, or being attacked by squids. Also I was with Catherine, and she doesn't remember any of these, nor is she in any way covered in paint.

My lovely brown retro babies! Painted! Actually, I think they look good, so I'm not that upset, but I am scared, and may not be able to drink again until I found out what the liquor-pixies did to me on Tuesday night. If you can help, please do. By help I mean explanations and presents to make me feel better.